CRACK and POP
by MasterSatanOverlord
Summary: So Eren is jerking off for Levi, putting on a show. But Levi's not the one watching..? And Eren's not the one masturbating..? CRACK! I'm sorry!


**So here's the one-shot I promised. Yes, it's short, but next I'm updating everything else!**

 **THIS IS CRACK! As I said in, not only the description, but also in the first chapter of Scouts and Scales (Self promo, whaaaaat?). I'm sorry.**

The boy awakens to the loud shout of the corporal's voice. Eren looks groggily around the dungeon cell, confused when he sees no one. "Captain Levi, sir?" He sits up, rubbing the crust of sleep from his eyes.

"Come on Eren, I know this is your first time, but really?" Levi's voice had quieted, almost to a whisper, and was right in front of him, but still there was no Captain Levi. All he could see was his slightly hardened cock.

Reaching down he palms the straining appendage, surprised when it feels better than he thought and when he heard the corporal moan. That was what spurred Eren on, though he had never touched himself- too busy plotting revenge on titans-to stroke his stiff manhood. With each clumsy stroke there was a gasp or moan from Levi, the room soon filled with Eren and Levi's voices and the sound of the younger boy tugging on his penis. "L-Levi!" Eren shouts as he finishes, sending cum splattering up his chest, an almost growl is heard from Levi as he too,presumably, comes.

"Levi?" Eren calls out after a moment of silence, there's no answer from the man, but someone else was there.

"Not quite, Eren dear! But, if I may ask,how long have you liked the dear corporal?" The crazy doctor's voice rings out, just before Hanji pops into sight. Eren blushes a deep red, not knowing how long they had been there.

"Hanji? How long have you been there? Where did the captain go?" The young titan shifter was both confused and mortified.

"I've been here the whole time sweetie, and I assure you, Captain Levi has been in bed all night. He's cranky without his beauty sleep, you know."

"But... But his voice was... Were you imitating him?" The boy becomes indignant.

"Of course not sweetie! That was your body." The doctor assures him. "At your age it's really common to become aroused by even the slightest thing and when this happens, those who have a penis anyway, will harden. Now if you're awake the first time this happens, it might shock, or even scare you, as the peniswill make a loud 'popping' sound. After the initial noise of recognition, it will take on the voice of whoever holds your affection to push you on, to gain all the pleasure you can. So, I'll ask again. How long have you liked the corporal?" Eren's face flushes once again in pure embarrassment. After a few moments, Hanji sighs, recognizing Eren won't talk. "Fine, you don't have to tell me. One other thing, though, since you know nothing of sex." The doctor moves closer to the teen, reaching hands to Eren's chest, quickly they pinch his nipples, sending out a loud cracking sound, as if a titan popped it's knuckles. "This is a common occurrence as well at your age. This is one of the few things about human's sexual stimulation we haven't figured out yet. But this is something everyone experiences, regardless of bodily gender. Well, that's all! Didn't want you freaking out, or being in shock the first time you find yourself in bed with Levi. Have a good sleep Eren!~" The scientist runs off, leaving Eren dazed and in wonder before a devilish grin crosses the boy's face, taking the place of disbelief. Shortly after, his face, hair, and body began to shift back to his regular blonde. Leaving Draco sitting there and Eren climbing out from waaay under the bed.

 **So. This is it. The crack I promised. I know I also promised to begin on updating everything else first, but I have another almost crack type thing I want to start on first. So you're getting a new multichapter story, then new updates on old crap. For real this time.**

 **Again, really sorry for... *looking up and gesturing at the really short one shot* that... *shuddering in disgust at myself and jumping off a bridge and into the next story*.**

 **See ya next time, maybe...**

 **~Satan**


End file.
